It looks easy enough to double wrap a strand of pearls around my wrists and layer on a bunch of necklaces and chains, but I fear that what looks very Les Fashionable on American Idol finalist (and Olsen twin doppelganger in this photo anyway), Ramiele Malubay, would look very Coco Chanel Halloween costume on me.

My friend Beth drew my attention to this new trend. How could I resist opening an email with the title “Is this the new dickey?” And yes, I believe the insidious scarflette is indeed the latest incarnation of “a false shirt-front – originally known as a detachable bosom”. Check out some examples:

Why do I hate these so much, you ask? Let me count the ways:

1) Scarflette vendors inevitably style their models wearing a scarflette and nothing else. Aside from the suspension of disbelief this requires (if it’s warm enough to pose nude, the model’s neck probably isn’t freezing), I’d be much more likely to buy one if the retailer actually showed me how a scarflette could be used to accessorize my fall and winter outfits.

2) I already own a million chunky necklaces that I don’t get to wear nearly often enough — and they don’t itch or threaten to choke me

3) When I was in elementary school, I went through a phase of penning my own Goosebumps-inspired short stories…including one which featured a heroine whose hid her decapitated state from the world by attaching her head to her body through the use of a strategically-tied scarf. Apparently, I did a good job freaking myself out, because I remember it to this day and refuse to wear anything that might make me resemble The Headless Horsewoman.

What do you think? Do I need to rethink scarflettes? Are these something you’ll be adding to your wardrobe this season?

Ombre items are making an appearance on StyleFeeder’s wishlists, however, so it’s quite possible that I’m wrong about the wearability of this trend. Let’s take a look at some of the options people have bookmarked recently:

StyleFeeder leanneshain was the first to add this sherbet-hued confection by Michael Kors. I can definitely see the appeal of ombre for a special occasion; graduated gowns are both glam and flattering. And since you’re only likely to wear a gown like this once or twice, you’ll seem entirely of the moment.

But when it comes to high-end accessories, is ombre a good investment? Will you possibly be able to get away with wearing an ombre heel or handbag next season?

These Charles David Beatriz pumps are stunning, but I don’t know if I could bring myself to part with $195 unless I had the perfect outfit in mind for these beauties.

And I definitely wouldn’t part with several C-Notes for either of these options, by Prada and Cynthia Vincent, respectively.

Leave it to our own Shoe Addict, Megan, to find some budget versions that nicely fit the bill if you do want to try on this trend for size.

These pumps by Wanted are a near-perfect facsimile of the Prada version, and at $50, you won’t feel too much regret if you only get a season’s wear out of them. I actually prefer the shading on this pair, as it’s more gradual and not so stark.

These Bandolino flats don’t have quite the same impact as the Cynthia Vincent version, but they feature the same unusual color palette at a fraction of the price.

If you really want to try out ombre on a budget, these flats from Ami Clubwear are just $17.99!

As for me, maybe I just need to admit that ombre isn’t my thing. Though I was able to dig up one ombre item I might, possibly, consider splurging on.

I LOVE cowboy boots, and I’ve always wanted a pair in red, but living in Boston, it’s hard enough to get away with wearing my much-loved, battered and beat-up brown Justins. But this Gucci Western-style boot so stylishly blends red and black, the graduated shade is subtle enough for the East Coast, but would still let me have my pop of red.

Do you actually own an ombre item, or is it a trend you’re admiring from afar?