Here comes the bridesmaid
So it’s wedding season and for the first time since I’ve passed Flower Girl age, it matters to me. In July, I was a bridesmaid at my good friend’s beautiful wedding and next month, I’m going to my cousin’s wedding and I’m having a hard time figuring out what to wear.
The bridesmaid deal was awesome – all I had to do was show up and wear what the bride told me to. But as a guest, there are all these unspoken rules. Don’t wear white or anything that could compete with the bride’s gown. Don’t wear anything too flashy (i.e. slutty), but – in the words of an aunt at the wedding I just came from, “make sure your legs are showing and your lips are shining”… don’t ask. So, I’m asking for your advice. Think I should go for something like this lilac Vera Wang dress – strapless and ankle-length with a little fashionista flourish?
What about this flirty Betsey Johnson number? Too much?
Your thoughts, pleeeze!
Comments (121)
121 Comments
I like the Vera Wang. The length is more formal, but the flowiness and the detailing around the top give it more of a maxi dress vibe, so you won’t feel overdressed if other guests go more the cocktail-length route. Not to mention, the color would be gorgeous against your skin. A dramatic necklace, maybe in gold, and you’d be good to go. I’m curious about this aunt’s adage though…
I’ve totally heard your aunt’s adage before, though more about going out on a date
)
I think it really depends on the day & time of the wedding.
for just general opinions…
…I think the short dress is cute, but needs to be a little more dressy to be wedding-worth (although it’s perfect for a daytime outdoor wedding)
…love the color & style of the Vera Wang. definitely a good choice for any wedding time or day (unless of course the bridesmaids are wearing that color). totally love it!
so yes, I say Vera, but I mean, it’s Vera Wang for a wedding–what else could you pick to top it?
)
im not gunna lie for a summer weeding the vera wang seems a little much. i would go with the betsy. if its a summer wedding i say you can never go wrong with a strapless knee length floral. a staple in any summer wardrobe!
i love the betsey johnson number! i thik its cute and girlie and perfect for a wedding…u could dress it up with some nice accessories (bracelets/shoes)…have fun!!
absolutelly Vera Wang!and the earring of swarovski http://www.swarovski.com/product/Kyrat+Clip+Earrings/Web_IT/en?CategoryName=91134&Promotion=true
I say the Vera Wang… sleek, classic… will never go out of season.. and you could possibly wear it again.
the betsey johnson design is a very nice dress to wear on a wedding if u are a guest but since ur a bridesmaid i have to say that a much better pick would be the vera wang. u would never go wrong with that classic piece of long lilac dress. it will make u look much more classy and stylish.
love both of them, i think the vera wang would compliment if the wedding is an evening ceremony and the betsey johnson would be great a somone else pointed out, an afternoon outdoor wedding.
the one piece of advice i always try to follow, find out what colors the bridesmaids are wearing and avoid at all costs! i have a friend who wears the same shade as the bridemaids to every wedding she goes to. as if, she should be standing up there in place of someone else.
I really like the Betsy one. Not to sure about the Vera Wang… it seems a little over done; plus the Betsy one can be dressed down after the occasion where as the Vera only suits one type of occasion and isn’t as versatile as the other.
The Vera Wang is perfect!!
Go with the Betsy Johnson. No one in a short dress will look like they are competing with the bride. You will look adorable dancing in it, too, and comfortable. Add pumps, a shawl and pearls or classic accessories, and it’s wedding. Add flats or strappy sandals, chunky costume jewelry or long rope necklaces and bangles, and you are ready to club.
I think it all comes down to a couple of things:
Is the wedding day or night?
Black tie or not?
night and black tie – vera – although, its a bit spendy for a one-off, right? (doesn’t seem like that’s your issue though, v. nice)
day or informal wedding – betsey! (it does look re-wearable)
both are style-tastic.
main thing – have fun!
go with the vera wang dress, will look amazing on you. it’s so gorgeous, and you will feel great in it.
I think they are both of them very beautifull but i have two question if the wedding will be inside and like coctail or dinner i should u the first but if it will be out i should u the vera Wang and i think will be realy nice with ur skin
have a nice wedding
I personally like both the dresses but I would choose the Betsey Johnson dress because its length is more summer-y and the color doesn’t overwhelm the summer almost “casual” vibe of the wedding. The Vera Wang number’s length and fabric gives me the impression that it would be more suitable for a formal evening party though its straplessness and detailing does keep it from being super fancy at the same time.
Overall; choose the BJ one, I think
You can never go wrong with a classic style dress. The Vera Wang is absolutely lovely, and her styles usually compliment most figures. It looks exquisite, and you’ll feel exquisite in it. The other dress is cute, but you’re worth more than “cute”. It also looks as though it would work for no matter what time of day the wedding is.
Go with the Besty Johnson number. It cute and flirty!! I think the other might be a little too formal unless its an evening wedding with a seated dinner. In that case….VERA WANG ALL THE WAY!!
Vera Wang never fails and this model is perfectly suitable for all figures. I don’t think that this Betsy Johnson would fit to a wedding, specially in that color. Don’t like that angular pleats either… hmm, perhaps for other ocasion but not for a wedding. I think it reminds me too much the dresses my elementary school teacher used to wear :/
So… go Vera. You will look absolutely amazing on it
you know, both are nice, the second one is nice, but do you have other colours for that style, pink maybe??
hope to be a help
The Vera Wang is absolutely GORGEOUS!!! I’ll agree with what everyone else is saying about how it depends on the day & time of the wedding. Now, you said the wedding is next month—so it would not be a “summer” wedding (as some ppl have said). Therefore, I think the Betsey Johnson is not “fall” enough in color. Its more of a spring/summer dress (but very cute)!. The Vera Wang would be perfect if it is a traditional indoor dinner reception, and the detailing on top stops it from being TOO formal–you know? The color would look great on you! I vote for the Vera Wang all the way. I’m sure you’ll have a great time no matter which dress you choose!
If it’s a day wedding, I’d go with the Betsy; for evening, the Vera. I don’t think the Vera’s too much; its simplicity and fun color save it from being over-dressy. Besides, she’s the queen of weddings. She’s as great at guest gowns as she is at bridal!
Vera Wang Babe, I love this dress and I think the color would really compliment your skin. You wouldn’t need too much accessories, just great shoes and a pretty necklace. You will look stunning, go and have FUN!!
I work in Coast, so do this all the time, one unspoken rule is, the closer to the couple you are, the more extravegant you can dress. But then a second rule is if its a summer rule, light colours.
So, saying that: my opinion is the second. Much more “weddingy”. Betsy it is
I like both dresses, but looking at your picture I think that a Betsey Johnson type dress would better serve your needs. The Vera Wang dress is really fly though.
I like the Vera Wang. I think it is more formal and would work well, whether the wedding is during the day or evening. As a church pianist who probably ‘witnesses’ about 15-20 weddings a year, I’m appalled at the number of people who either dress down, or wear ill-fitting dresses. At 42, I never thought I would be ‘old-fashioned’; however, a lot of folks nowadays normally don’t even have church clothes, much less something that is ‘wedding suitable’.
I would’t worry about the color…if you are wearing the same colors as the bridesmaids, so be it. You ‘fit in’ with the color scheme of the wedding. When in doubt, regardless whether or not I am the accompanist at a wedding or not, I often times wear black, since that is a staple color for musicians. (Most musicians, vocalists, etc., tend to wear black or black and white.)
Sorry for waxing on…just my 2 cents! I love the elegance of the Vera Wang. The Betsy is a little too ‘flirty’ for a lack of a better word. Go with the classic! And have fun!
wow. thanks for all this amazing advice! the wedding’s September 6th so I’ll definitely let you know what I end up wearing.
I’m leaning toward the Betsy. Thinking towards etiquette… if the wedding/reception are going to be late in the day and into the evening, then the more formal vera wang is the appropriate choice, if during the day, especially if outside, then the betsy johnson is the way to go.
You didn’t say what time of day the wedding is, or if it is indoor or outdoor;so the rule of thumb would be if it is after five-the more formal looking long one-Vera Wang, if it’s outdoors during the day-Betsy Johnson (though if it’s held at a church, you may want to consider a shrug for covering the shoulder-yes, i’m from the south and old-school)!
I think the Vera Wang is the best choice. Not only is it the right length but the color is gorgeous. I think is is just wrong to wear white to someone elses wedding..call me old fashion!
My opinion has already been echoed above, but here’s my 2 cents: If evening and formal wedding, Vera. If daytime and/or outdoor, Betsey. I live in the Midwest, and the Vera would compete with the bridesmaids at all but the most formal of weddings. And definitely avoid the bridesmaid dress color at all costs. Have fun!
Even though both dresses are beautiful, I would go for the Betsy Johnson. But if the wedding is in the evening i owuld go for the Vera Wang.
i wouldn’t choose either. The floor length of the Betsy Johnson is too formal — looks like you’re competing with the bridesmaids if not the bride. The Vera Wang is too close to white — but in another color it would be perfect.
Girlfriend i will say weir the Vera Wang dress even if it is too long maybe you are a kind of lady that like to so a leg and if you may please do so and find out if you can make the dress a bit shorter if not just keep the dress as it ease. i think the colour will suit you well and add a bit more put on some different kind of blue eyeshadow and try to get some nice glossy lipstick that will make you lips glow the whole day and please dont use brown or choclate brown lipstick use something different that will bring that blue dress and blue eyeshodow out and you no what it doesnt matter which time of the day the wedding is as long as you feel comfortable and good in it. Long dresses is coming back in SA a specially for the end year parties. so you go girl enjoy being different. these pale dresses is just boaring. You going to look stuuuuuning.
Good Luck
Anna-Marie from South Africa
Oops — I had the two designers backwards in the previous post.
Maybe you could wear both of them. The Betsy Johnson would be a great choice for a daytime wedding, and if you can find time to change, the Vera Wang would be perfect for the reception.
I like the long one, maxi dresses are hot! The short one looks too much like a bridesmaid dress to me.
I’m totally digging the Vera Wang number. Yes, it is very nice looking but, I think if you tried you’d be able to “tone it down” a notch by not putting too many and by adding few accessories!
Best wishes to the happy couple and Ihope that you get the help your wanting in decision making, Abigale Brown Phil. 4:13
Hay, let’s face is, they are both nice. Seeing you in them would be the deciding factor. But for now, I will just advise you that it’s consideride rude to wear white to a wedding. That privelage is left for the bride. Have fun.
I’d go for the Vera Wang. I don’t like the Betsy Johnson very much, too much going on.
i like the betsy for a summer wedding and its a dress that you can wear more than once.
I believe both are beautiful dresses. Its just a matter of choice keeping in consideration these factors: age, weight, height as well as the time of day.
The Betsey Johnson would be the best thing for a wedding, i think. The other dress is more of a formal thing that you could wear for a Christmas dance. A shorter dress you can actually get up and dance in!
i like the vera wang dress, the betsey number seems a little light in color and perhaps a little too short for a wedding.
Being A Black Girl Myself I Think the lilac Vera Wang dress Would Suit You Better As It Goes With Your Coloring & Is Long Which Wont Obviously Show Off Your Legs But Gets An Idea & It Has A Nice Flow To it Too
Hope Thats Any Help I’m Just Jealous Yu Can Afford Them What I’d Give To Owe One Of Those.
O Btw Yu Could Always Get Them Both But Get The Betsey Johnson In Perhaps A Different Color.x
I think the Vera Wang is a safe choice! But the flower on the Betsy Johnson is a little too much
i thik da lilac vera wang dress gonna be owesome,, n it goes with ur skin n a beautiful way((cuz iluv dat color)),,,lilac dress with adiamond necklace gonna be fabuolas;)
Wear the Vera Wang if you’re in the wedding party and the short Betsey dress if you’re a guest. Only the wedding party should wear formal wear.
Vera Wang!!!!! the Best……
IT really depends on how formal the day is. Since you picked these two, I assume it’s a relatively formal occasion — afternoon wedding? I’d choose the blue — it’s timeless and classic. Good luck!
My choice would definitely be the Vera Wang dress if it’s an evening wedding. Betsey Johnson if it’s a daytime wedding.
If it’s an evening or formal wedding I would go with the Vera Wang, if other, than the Betsy Johnson. Both are adorable!
If it is a daytime wedding then pick the Betsey Johnson but for an evening wedding I think the Vera Wang is gorgeous
If the wedding is daytime and outside, I would go with the Betsy Johnson. For anything else, I would definately go with the Vera Wang. Both dresses are gorgeous!
They are both great, but I’d pick the Vera Wang in a second – it’s gorgeous, classy and you have an excuse to look awesome in it!!!
Go for the Betsy Johnson, the Vera Wang is a bit much.
vera wang, will b looking good on you. but yes, day time go for something light.
I’d go for the Betsey Johnson.
The Vera Wang dress is saying, Im not white, so im not competing with the bride and trying to look better…but really u are….
I have to echo everyone else — if this is an evening wedding of the more formal tone, then yes, the Vera Wang for sure. However, if it’s during the daytime, and especially if it happens to be outside, the Betsy Johnson dress is perfect. The only thing with that dress is you would have to be mindful of your accessories as to not make it look -too- informal.
I really love the flirty Betsey Johnson number! It looks stylish and understateed. I think that you will shine with this one, without over doing it.
Definitely the Vera Wang. It’s beutiful. I don’t even like the other dress!
Both dresses are beautiful but you need to choose something that you’ll wear to another occassion.
But the Vera Wang is the dress to go for, sassy, classy. The lenght is perfect.
The colour is good for co-ordinating with any type of accessory.
hey sweets…
if u want me to choose a dress for u..first m very happy to say that ur in proper place..
if u r ready il b glade to design a dress for u as m a designer…
if if u want me to choos one of dresses u hav already given then i prefer the long one..n both the colours r not suitng to u..so there for u i porefer dark meroon color..ul b pretty in that color..
wel think of it..n tel me..i would lov to help u out..
both nice, but i like the second one more.
and i think the first one BJ it is rather fit to wedding wear.
but for ture , main thing is have fun.
; )
I agree what Karen said
Well… Both dresses are amazing…. But I would go with the Vera Wang. The color doesn’t compete with the bride and it’s flowy enough for day or night. Esp. if the wedding ceremony is day and reception in the vening, it would get you through it all.
I do like the Besty Johnson dress as well… Would be wonderful for outdoors on a hot day….
Hummm….
Nope, still Vera Wang!
Love the Vera Wang
The vera wang is a great staple for your wardrobe. You can use it after the wedding as well like formal dinners or dances. If it is a day time wedding in a lush garden or a wedding at a place with trees and etc., I would recommend the betsy as it is short and won’t get you hot as the vera wang is very long and if the sun is shining very brightly i would recommend the betsy. Its very wedding looking!
ı think blue one is perfect
the abetsy aajohnson is awsome for a wedding, the Vera Wang is too long and flowy for a guest, leave those to the bride and her maids. the Betsy is pretty and simple and nice. complement it with high sandals and jewlery of a dark green and you will look fantastic!
Vera weng dress looks so classy.I would definetly choose it for a night wedding.In my opinion you should wear the dress without neckless(if yo do it will look too much ) but with a flashy earrings and wear your heels you’re ready to go.Good luck!
I´d say definetly the Vera Wang dress it´s perfect in every way.
I love the color aswell, it suits your skintone perfectly.
the Vera Wang dress is absolutely it gurl! its pretty, cute n so flexible, lets not forget sexy for your wedding. make the wise choice. splendid! lol
I think the long blue one looking at only your facial features
I have to say, I prefer the Vera Wang. It just fits my image of a stylish bridesmaid dress better than the other one.
The Vera Wang no doubts!!!!
The white only the bride should wear!!
Well personally i feel the Vera wang dress will definitely compliment your complexion. With the right make-up & high hair style probably with some curls you would look like a princess….
the vera wang will look absolutely stunning on you. The colour would really pop against your skin. I also agree with gold accessories, but you’d wanna keep it minimal. Maybe a pair of lovely gold ear-rings/thick gold bangle/or a gold necklace that doesn’t spell o-u-t-r-a-g-e-o-u-s.
Well it really depends on the time of the wedding . i like both dresses but i believe the Vera Wang dress would be an excellent choice.I hope you have fun at the wedding whatever you decide to wear. Just remember to pick the one you believe makes you feel more confident and comfortable while wearing it….
i like the Verra Wang, but it all depends on the weather, time of day and the type of wedding
Both dresses are amazing! I think you should wear Betsy Johnson… It’s perfect to enybody…
i like the vera wang… or else try this one;
http://www.bluefly.com/David-Meister-emerald-pleated-satin-empire-belted-dress/PRODUCT_CROSS-SELL/214448600/detail.fly
they’re both gorgeous! – but the betsy johnson is kinda white so maybe not the best choice for a wedding…?
I say go with the Vera Wang. It is classic, sleek and elegant. Best choice hands down.
I really looooooove the Betsey Johnson dress. It wont overpower the bride’s dress and you would still look cute.
I really looooooove the Betsey Johnson dress. But since it is white It might overpower the bride’s dress and you would not want to do that! I say go for the Vera Wang dress.
Both gorgeous dresses!
The betsy is my choice though. It’s more versatile to jazz up. the vera you’ll have to dress down to not look overdone and regular.
The betsy can go day or night. dressy Sandals for day and maybe some patent pointy pumps for night and some nice accessories to suit each look.
It really depends on what your personality is like. The vera can be bohemic or extra elegant depending on the accessories, whereas the betsy in silk bracade, is classy whatever you choose.
Anyway have fun either way.
I like the the color and style of the Vera Wang but its a little too long to me. the length and style of the Betsey is cute. Maybe you can get the Vera shortened and use the material as a wrap or find a similar one thats shorter. GOOD LUCK!
It’s Vera all the way. If you are just a guest at this wedding and not immediate family then rules can be bent in your favor. You could and should wear what makes you look gorgeous and feel great. You are a beautiful woman and just because you are at a wedding doesn’t mean you have to hide your gorgeous self. Have a great time at the wedding.
Hey nana,
I think you should wear the flirty Betsey Johnson outfit, it would go better with your skin. I’m with mary, wear something that makes you feel gorgeous, cause who knows what might happen for you at the wedding.
Might meet a certain prince charming,lol…
Well enjoy, and drink a few for all the girls here,lol
Bye,x
I THINK BETSEY JHONSON I LIKE ITS COLOR AND ITS SHOW YOU VERY BEAUTİFUL
though, it’s all pretty but i prefer the betsey jhonson dress for you since it’s pretty when you wear it than the vera wang dress..=)
Although both dresses are truly gorgeous, the Vera Wang is very status-quo while the Bestsey Johnson dress rings the alarm – as Betsey herself intends! Having been married for six years now, if one of my guests had asked my opinion about which dress to wear at my wedding, I would have said do Betsey. I wanted all my guests to look and feel their best. Besides, there was no way in the world anyone could compete when I was the one getting married and the spotlight was on me irregardless of what anyone was wearing. Wear what makes you feel the prettiest!
i prefer the betsey, u gonna look beautifull. all d best
hey ! If you want to look like a real lady then take the Vera Wang !!! It´s so a beautiful dress and with silver earrings and necklesses it will be look fantastic !!! But when you want to look like a flirty and dreamy woman/girl then take the Betsey Johnson !!!
Both dresses are real eyecatchers and I think that isn´t important for what you will decide, because the others will say that you are beautiful !!! So not the dress make a woman pretty !!! How she is wearing it makes the woman to the one everybody is turning around !!!
Both are beautiful. If it’s at night, I’d go for the Vera Wang; if during daylight, the Betsey Johnson.
definately the betsy….besides its a summer wedding and yeah the vera seema a lil too much..
Personally I say go with the Vera Wang at the end of the day you don’t want to look back at pics and say ” Dayam wish i wore that Vera!” It’s a hot dress and unless the Bride goes informal you won’t out shine her I say go forth, look hot and conquer the world! LOL!
i think u should go with the Dark one..since am with not wearin a light color as not to be nywhere near the Bride
I like the Betsy.
take the betsey jhonson if its on the day and if it fits your legs. If it is at night, take the Bera Wang, but make sure the colour suits you.
I have to agree and say to go with the Vera Wang dress. It’s beautiful and seems to be very wedding-appropriate.
i’d have to pick the vera wang.
Depending on ur height, I believe the 2 are ok with a high heeled sandal or long strap sandals irrespectively with gd accessories to fit but if its a church service d johnson is ok and vera wang is a good one for cocktail or dinner. Dont forget ur veil on d neck for any one u use
Like your aunt said, legs & gloss! BJ all the way
i love vera wang, its formality speaks more of an evening wear but i think i’ll go wit betsy johnson with a little more accerssories especially when its a daytime wedding. do not forget high heeled sandals it adds some vibe.
i love vera wang, its formality speaks more of an evening wear but i think i’ll go wit betsy johnson with a little more accerssories especially when its a daytime wedding. do not forget high heeled sandals it adds some vibe.
I like it more lila Vera Wang dress.
))
the vera wang is very nice but a bit over the top.
i like and prefer and recommend the betsy johnson dress, you can wear it with a colourfull scarf or beautiful jewelry, or go for a beautiful pair of jimmy choo shoes, a lot of ways to dress it up.
good dress also to dance in!! always important to think about
good luck and have fun!!
I think the Vera Wang is much better as a style, but as a color I think the short dress’ color will complement you skin color more than the vera wang purple dress would do!
I really like the betsy johnson dress.
I’m not sure if I am being biased because im a teenager, but I really like it because it’s cute and flirty and if you have great legs, it will come in handy
me encantan los vestidos perfectos para salir en la noche quedaran perfectos paraa ena mujer alegre y sofisticada a la vez …. son maravillosos
the betsy johnson dress most definately! its formal enough for the wedding and casual enough for the party afterwards! plus, its absolutely gorgeous haha.
have a good time!
The dresses are wonderful, bravo for the taste… Well I’d choose the Vera Wang:
-1st because it’s shining with glamour not matter when or where you wear it
-2nd because the colour is perfect and goes perfectly with your hair colour and tan
Also spice it with some cool LONG silver earings, shoes and a bag in the same colour and you’re gonna be flawless.
Now, for the Betsey dress… It’s great for day weddings but definitively choose another colour, And you’re gonna have to pay much more attention to the acessories.
Considering that I’m 16, maybe you won’t agree with me, but that’s my oppinion. I hope I helped you.
Anyway, whatever you choose, remember to always smile and have a great time no matter what you wear
Hi,
If it were me, I’d always choose the dress that I knew I could wear again to other things – and especially in the harsher months, such as summer or winter, rather than spring or fall, that matters more.
I know what you mean about being in a wedding and just wearing whatever is chosen for you – myself, though I liked that too, I never wore those outfits again. This time you get to choose and it’d nice as you can find one special outfit that you know you’ll get more use out of than another. To me, it would be the shorter length, just for the different events it would be appropriate for.
if it’s a night time wedding, hands down the Vera dress. during the daylight hours, though, the Betsey dress seems more sound. it states your presence without yelling “i’m here!”
good luck!
I love the vera wang it’s color is gorgeous
Something longer, definitely. More conservative and formal.
The Caring Nurse
hi, if it was me…i wd def go for da vera wang dress and since u r not just one of da guests being a brides maid i think this dress wd b more appropriate and def classy..
Your choice of dresses depends on several factors: (1) inside or outside; (2) afternoon or evening; (3) formal or informal, etc.
If the wedding is a formal evening wedding I would definitely choose the stunning Vera Wang but if it is an informal afternoon wedding the Betsey Johnson would be most appropriate.
love both!! personally i would go with the bj dress, its fabulous!!!! but i agree with the others it depends on the time and the place, i dont think the vw is a good color for u, the shape is lovely but you should consider the color!!!
the best of luck!!!
hey, i think both dresses are beautiful, but to choose one i think the vera wang works best, the color isnt like to white, and it isnt major competition for a bride gown, i hope everything goes well, and good luck with deciding which one you like better, honestly its your opinion, not anyone elses, so if one is choosen more and you are leaning to the other one more, follow through with what you like, have fun!
This the best dress for most attractive people. I like it very much.